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I would advise you to read N. below and of course all of this too.
1. Well, I feel a touch embarrassed to say this, but Lord Vishnu tells Me that E is where I am.
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One Direction. Remember that band?
A. WHAT IT IS
1. When I was a kid My teachers taught Me that there was something called
South and West and North. This is an out and out lie.
2. There is one direction and most places it is East but for Jappy people it is West.
This direction is towards India which is where I am.
3. To find this direction you do NOT use a compass.
A compass will say E, which is another name for Me or He,
but it has NO intelligence. ZERO.
It has if truth be told NO knowledge of where I am, or even where its toenail is.
4. Stand straight, or if you got less than 2 feet sit straight.
Be peaceful there. Relax.
Observe the temples (part of your face on the side just above eye level) and observe
the back of your brain.
Are they tense? Your DIRECTION is where these 3 places have least tension.
So, example, in My case, the norm is for Me to have zero tension in these 3 places,
and elsewhere too. So suppose I am wanting to dance the 'ho ho dance' or to cross the street,
which way do I face it is straight forward where there is zero tension.
If I turn My head to the right I get tension in My right temple.
If I turn to left I get evil in My left temple.
And if I turn backwards I get evil in My back of skull. I KNOW which way to go and it facing straightforwards towards E.
5. On this website, I occasionally jest a little, and say I or E or My etc.
and you think maybe I am a vain proud person. This is not actually true.
6. So, once you get relaxed up there you will know which way to face,
which maybe is not towards Me, but to face towards E, wherever you get peace.
Of course I like to think possibly foolishly that My loved One is lodged firmly in My heart which currently is in Kollam I think, but quite possibly She is in New York,
flirting with another lover, possibly. It is Her call what She does.
7. So it maybe the Indian army is coming at Me, or a truck,
or a naked woman on the right hand side and I keep walking straight at em.
So too should you, eg when dancing.
The man faces which way he should and the woman then faces him.
If she does not want to, you got yourself the wrong woman.
8. Is E up or down? When the English poisoned the local village wells,
the Hindu women had to carry a jug etc of water a little bit further.
If they looked up, they had to do it all over again.
And if they looked down, they had to do it all over again.
Of course this did not happen to Indian women, who were otherwise engaged.
So, E is straight ahead, not up, not down.
If an Englishman wants water he may have to walk a little with a jug placed
directly on top of him (see below).
In the brain there is delicate fluid.
It needs to be balanced directly over a straight relaxed spine, which is vertical.
Not in a coffin and not asleep.
Just because the Americans do not like their Muslim prisoners to sleep,
however, it does not mean that you should just stop sleeping or use force to wake up
your baby or dog. If these stupid people want to sleep it is not your business.
You do the best you can for E which is far away from good enough.
Similarly, you may need exercise or whatever.
9. Now, I am very very proud of Myself.
While E was in some hell hole or wherever in Calcutta,
I all on My own invented SHOULDER EXERCISE. See below.
10. These couple of days, in My opinion E has been a touch on the mean side to Me.
I do not think She hates Me too much,
I think She is trying to help Me write this website with feeling and a couple of tears.
11. About 12 years ago I fell in love with a Ukrainian woman,
actually there have been 2 of these in My life.
Anyways this lady has not been like perfectly nice to Me.
Of course, she loves Me, but 2 days back she wrote Me an email which kind of hurt Me.
So My manhood went.
12. So, obviously I do not want to be a baby, so I came up with the 'adult ho ho dance'.
13. And today when I woke up My man was perked up ready.
Facing exactly the way man and woman hood should face when they wake up.d-rection.
14. I been having trouble big trouble with powering up My tablet computer thinggy, last 34 hours.
The electricity goes off. Then the tablet does not charge up even with the electricity on...
Actually I do not really mind about this website, I said I would do it
and I know She wants Me to finish it off. I have direction on this.
So, I am more than a little determined to finish it.
Anyways, tablet out of juice, I have lots and lots of ideas of what I want to tell you.
Finally I say to Myself this morning, I wonder whether I have another cable to put into
the extension socket.
Maybe the existing one got hot and blew itself up in excitement, like a Muslim suicide bomber.
So, actually I do not have many possessions, so I searched hard in the 2 chocolate boxes,
the toffee box, and them it hits Me in the eye. I find a spare chord.
I wack it in, it works for about 1 minute, I get to 1% charged up and then it ceases working.
I was all excited typing up as typists do get. So then I say let Me search My handbag,
and (real truth),
I find 2 more chords. So total, I got 4 chords, all not working but taking their time not working,
like Me yesterday. Anyways, it really did take hours, but eventually I say cut this crap,
I am going to focus My attention on one.
So I select, by chance the prettiest one, with a orange light on her.
This orange light starts off happy when I put it in the extension chord and then goes dim.
I detect a few tears, maybe they were on Me.
You know how American women in Texas they sit bare back on a stallion,
and lean back with a whip, and drive the stallion real excited,
before it bucks up and whooshes them onto the podium ring for them to break their neck,
this is what INDIAN woman has to do to her MAN.
So, if your man is facing with his head towards the wall, you sit back,
facing the wall, lean back when you sit on him, and then the red light flashes and you get power.
If you are like Me used to BRITISH equipment,
you think I will just have the adaptor square on into the extension
and the red light starts up for
1 minute and then fades. Of course when the lights go dull, you lean forward
and give him a kiss.
These are several aspects about d irection.
With Indian man, you got to be gentle and let him sleep,
do not get him excited, definitely no whips.
Best is to keep your panties and bra on like they do in Christian countries,
but no head to toe burka like in Muslim countries.
Husbands do not like you going out with other men if you keep your burka on.
15. You know, I like America. A few years ago I was planning to settle there.
A place called Big Sur in SOUTHERN California. At the time I was rich. I also had a green card.
So I whipped across the ocean from London and headed NORTH (from near Mexico)
along the WEST coast and I never hit Big Sur.
Just somehow missed it and so I headed EAST back towards London.
16. Today, I was FEELING a touch sorry, and so I came up with a new LOVE SONG
"A Kyoto Japan Love Song".It is a real nice place, East of India.
Nothing whatsoever to do with yoyo yoko.
B. SHOULDER EXERCISE
1. You stand in front of him or her depending.
2. On your 2 feet, or you sit on bed in front etc.
(50% of Christians and Muslims will be losing a foot).
3. You bend your arms, clench your fists by your rib cage,
and bring your elbows as far forward as you can, with them wide apart.
4. Then with full force you wack them back into her and say at the same time
"oh I apologize madam, I did not realize you were there". Do this 4 times.
5. Then, same thing, but when the elbows are forward and apart you lift them up as high
as you can and then jab backwards towards where her heart ought to be.
6. Then similar, but you bring the elbows close together and forward. Lift them up high.
Then it so happens, when you with full force swing the elbows down and back
and in a circular motion up behind you, they go straight into her eyes.
And then you say "you will never see your husband again".
C. ADULT HO HO DANCE
You stand facing East. You pretend to dance.
You stay a while, bring peace to your mind, tranquility, emptiness.
Love is not about the mind. It is about emotions and feelings.
So you stand there and in your mind you say I am going to make my man (woman) happy,
or I am going to go all out to be able to make my future wife (hubby) happy.
Your hands remain clear of your vagina or penis, but can brush
gently or touch on wherever you want as the feeling comes to you, eg lightly on your thighs.
Also do not bring them to your nipples or chin.
To start off, just gently wave your body around. If you like you can sing or humm the Greek song.
(ho ho ho, etc. and I love you and moistness)
Then you determine that you are going to make your penis or vagina hard for him.
So, you merge the swaying into thrusting forward first to right a little, then left a little.
Your chest well open, your head looking straight forward, your feet about 1 foot apart (30cm).
And you look at him, or if he is not there you anyways do it for him.
And initially you go a little quick.
Then you grip the buttocks, draw back your abdomen, and proceed to go slow.
Your brain peaceful, quiet. It does not matter if you cannot keep your buttocks hard or
your abdomen soft, you are just trying the best you can for him.
Sometimes the thrust forward will be directly at him,
sometimes you will have more weight on your left foot,
and aim the thrust to the left of him.
It should not be a violent thrust, a nice easy very firm deliberate towards and away from him.
ho ho ho humm I love you.
It does not matter if you do not succeed, it comes with love and tears in your eyes.
Peace, steady, firm, gentle.
The above attempt in the pic is absolutely hopeless.
You got to look at him East not West to your lover, with eyes soft, moist and with love
unless you are a woman when he looks East and you look West.
D. LEG STRENGTHENING
You know, if you have ever been to Ellora near Pune, for example,
there were lots of sexy positions
that the Hindus tried
(nowadays the pictures have been destroyed by tourists etc,).
But not one ever got any satisfaction.
And the reason is that they did try with hard penis, vagina, buttocks etc.,
even if you look at the Greek statues they had wonderfully straight legs.
But they tried with hardness and evil not with love.
When BKS Iyengar perfected his postures, you cannot believe how much pain
he went through to get there.
You cannot believe what suffering the Buddhists inflicted on Buddhist women,
children, slaves, other Buddhists and of course themselves.
But, if you approach exercise, perfection with relaxation, with love,
initially it is true that you will have some pleasurable pain, depending on how evil you are.
But you can get to the same perfect vagina, or leg stretch,
through this giving love and being relaxed.
Instead of pain you get pleasure.
And you do not need a ramrod straight back,
you just need what you need for your husband or wife.
Anyway, I did the following today and thought why not wank. And, yet again, I had VD.
I did not do it yesterday, because of Ukrainan woman I mentioned above.
When you clean yourself, you have to have running water eg from shower or tap
not just clean yourself with your hand.
Just while I remember, you should never cross your legs, sitting, lying or standing.
It is disrespectful to My Lord. Although called 'simple cross legs',
the legs are not actually crossed.
Padmasana, if you have seen that yoga position, is a posture with legs crossed.
If you do that, that is unfortunate for you.
E. FOR CHILDRENS EYES ONLY
KIDDIE (if you are between age zero and
if when you rub near your legs nothing much happens):
If you can read, please now read out the following instructions to your mum and dad.
Tell them to:
lie on your back and bend your legs over your tummy. Knees a little apart.
(no feet crossed!).
And, relax etc, and then kick your own bottom hard.
Pretend you are cycling upside down and first raise your right leg up and kick down your heel
onto your right bottom.
At same time raise left foot up and then kick left buttock. Go quickly.
When your bottom is very very sore, stop.
And now KIDDIE, it is your turn. You just keep on wacking them on their bottom
until your poor hand gets sore and then same using your other hand.
These people have been very naughty and deserve as much punishment as you do.
THEN KIDDIE, ask them to do the following and after they have finished try
and figure out what you should do.
Next, try and kick your outer bottom, instead of centre.
Just keep going trying to cycle as fast as possible,
it is very important to be able to cycle fast, so that you can overtake fast moving cars.
Read them out this and while they slap themselves kiss them on the hair on their scalp
(top of their head, see if you can make as much noise as they do)
Next, keep your legs bent over your tummy, and slap your own bottom,
left hand onto your left bottom, right hand onto your right.
And most important, you should always be chewing chewing gum
at the same time as doing any exercise.
YOU DO 2 THINGS AT ONCE. You can manage it, lie on the bed and slap your bottom
AND read out next instruction to your mum or and dad.
Next, stand up on your two feet (if two, if only one skip this),
and kick your bottom again, first with one leg, then the other.
Your mum and dad may be feeling hot. Well they will be soon anyways.
So get a bucket of cold water and read out this to them.
Now again, lie down and bend your legs over your tummy.
On a related matter, did you know that ALL bugs love this position shortly before death?
Of course, when I say shortly, I mean in human terms.
For a bug, it is about 20% of a life, ie about 14 human years.
Actually great misfortune happened to Me this morning.
I was all ready and hard, and then I looked at the floor and there was an ant there.
And do you know what I did kiddie?
I poured water, one bucket near the ant, of course not to kill it,
but just to make it feel cold and unwanted, just like your parents do to you.
So, next kiddie do you see any bugs near you?
Half a bucket on your dad and half a bucket on your mum.
Now the best place to get them is on their genital organs.
Do you know where that is?
On a man it is a small soft object about 3 inches long (7.6 cm)
resting just near and at the top of his legs.
In addition, it is the two little pouches ie bags just under that, called his balls.
Your dad is a man, otherwise you would not be around.
On your mum, it is a little three inch slit (7.6 cm) at the same place.
If it is bigger she has been wacking in vibrators and stuff who knows what
to spoil her and her dad's pleasure.
When you pour, you pour quietly with love, steadily, and watch.
The effect of water is as follows:
1. On your dad his little thing called a penis expands to a size suitable for creating
maximum pleasure to his wife, your mum when he puts it in
the slit called a vagina and goes in and nearly out of the vagina slit.
If he loves your mum, it also becomes hard.
2. On your mum, the water makes the vagina muscles contract
so when her husband puts his penis in her, he experiences friction and so does she.
If they love each other both of them get pleasure from this,
just as you do when your nipples are gently pulled, squeezed, twisted etc.
3. The water makes them realize that they have not been good to you, and they will improve.
4. Nowadays there are lots of little bed bugs inside the bed.
These bugs carry disease.
They need to die. If your parents were healthy, it does not matter.
But for parents who are essentially ill, it is not good for them to get disease.
It is also not good for you to get disease.
So you should also pour water on your bed, near where your bottom is.
5. The bed bugs die, the water spreads and they do not like dampness or wetness
6. For your mum and dad, if they do not regularly put the penis into your mum's slit,
they will catch pneumonia.
All this means is that they do not catch something else another time.
So it makes no difference at all.
7. For you, it makes no difference at all.
F. ABOUT CHILDREN
All beings, dogs, lions, children etc. are good, unless brought up badly by
their parents or 'guardians'.
If a baby makes a noise other than eg 'mum' or whatever, or cries, it is the mum's fault.
If a child (human) answers back, watches horror movies, steals, shouts or whatever,
it is the father's fault if it is a boy and mother's fault if it is a girl.
However, it is the man's job to see to it that the mum cares for etc.
the baby, girl child, pet etc. properly.
He will suffer if he does not control his woman.
If she does not, the best place to hurt her until she does is her anus.
The best is to take for example a hammer and put it in until such time
as she says she wants to behave.
Give her a chance, and any subsequent misbehaviour kick her out.
If she leaves him, with a girl child or baby of his, which she can do,
she suffers for leaving him and for any wrong doing to his baby or child.
He suffers for any wrong he does to the boy child.
No child becomes bad on account of other children etc.
Once the child has reached puberty, any wrong doing is its fault.
In terms of pets, livestock, farm animals, zoo etc. any misbehaviour by the animal
and any evil done to the animal is the ultimate owner's fault while such is in captivity.
As usual if in doubt it is the man's fault.
G. ABOUT YESTERDAY
It is let us say a BAD day. I mean the previous day was BAD and.
LOOK, let Me be pretty much honest with you here, it goes like this.
In mathematics it is called a mathematical progression,
really they got that name a bit I mean
100% wrong. Bloody buddhists. It is called "Geometric nightmare regression".
Day 0 = 7 December 1952 =9= BAD.
Day 1 = 8 December 1952 =1= Very bad.
Day 2 = 9 December 1952 =2= Very very bad
Day (3) =10 rtc, = 3 times very bad
Day(365*64, Me) )= 365*64* very BAD,
til I die.
and then it gets a touch worse. I gotta live with her, instead of away from her.
It gets 'hellishly' worse.
Touch is an English expression for when you want to put yourself in between
two trucks coming at you at you at 50 kmph
(God knows what that is in Imperial measurement mph, probably high speed),
and slash your wrists and marry a Japanese woman so that you want to become a
jamahkaze pilot in WW3 in order to suicide yourself into
Japanese women like they did in WW2.
And that to sum up is yesterday.
H. How to make a man miserable.
Well simple. You just repeat what you did to him yesterday AND the day before etc.
ANYWAYS. She lies down and then you touch her.
Boy, you go for her right nipple. Girl you go for her left.
If same sex kiddies, then one on right and one on left. If 3 kiddies, one on her lips.
If 1 kiddie, one hand on right nipple, one on left.
MAN: orders her to squeeze legs together hard and to try and press abdomen down.
He touches her, by STROKING HER.
Eg left hand fingers lightly softly strokes her pubic hair upwards towards her navel
(if little pubic hair her skin instead),
and right fingers a little entry into vagina and stroking also upwards towards navel.
And every second breath, a quick sudden movement to open her lips to the maximum to the front.
Her man will be kind of jealous.
J. KIDDIES SEX EDUCATION LESSON
Now after H and perhaps I, you enter her,
kids to watch so they ultimately figure out how to do it themselves.
When done, preferably semen into toilet bowl, not her, close your penis/vagina and let urine
K. MESS WITH KIDDIES TIME
Man on boy's nipples, woman on girl's nipples
L. AND TOMORROW.
It is going to get better. ho ho humm and I love her.(See My article 'A Greek Song..)
PLEASE learn to trust Lord Vishnu.
2. Which means men and single women should face towards Varkala Beach, Kollam,
Kerala, India, ie Me, when possible.
3. If you are not too sensitive to know where that is from above, A,
then you buy a map,
or look on internet and if Varkala etc. is eg to W of where you are you face W etc.
If you are not sure where W is, you buy a compass and look at it.
Or you can download "applications" such as "Compass" for your mobile.
4. When you lie down, both man and woman, you should do so with your head
facing towards Me, with no clothes on, unless it is cold and you do not have blanket etc.
5. Unless you live there you should avoid going to 'holy' places associated with your religion,
like Mecca, Jerusalem, Jain 'holy' places, Vatican etc.
The penalty for going to such places if you do not live there is you lose your home.
6. About lying down, you need to do your best.
If you do not have the strength to turn your bed, you are excused, unless and until
you can find some one to help you.
7. You avoid crossing your legs. If you do it accidentally, no problem.
Deliberately, you will never want to do that again, same with 3 to 6.
8. About any children of yours, boys (men) or girls (women), those under puberty,
you give them these instructions, 1-7. After being given these, if they disobey you once,
turf them out of your or your ex etc. house.
Alternatively you can face punishment. If they do it again and they are still on your property,
you are free to cut off one of their legs which both of you will prefer to do than face second punishment.
9. Obviously accidents like children etc. do happen and you will not be punished for
an accident in regard to 1 to 8 above.
1. Well, I feel a touch embarrassed to say this, but Lord Vishnu tells Me that E is where I am.
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